Overly affectionate public displays of affection

So yes. I was sittin' like a cool kid on the train, with Annie, Gloriana and Cecilia (since the others had departed). And then Cecilia left.

And there was.. this couple. And.. they were.. Eating each other's faces out. And it was.. awkward, to say the least.

Well, it's really awkward when you look up from your newspaper to talk to Gloriana who's sitting in front of you and in your umm, what's that word - umm, view-range, there's a couple that's making out fervently right behind her.

And so Annie decided to point out: PDA DUDE! *draws arrow towards the couple*

And so I look up.

It seems that they have decided to slip the tongue.

Hmm.

I felt pretty awkward to say the least.

And well, yeah.

They proceeded to make out for another two billion years. And they got off at Revesby.

Hmm.

Well, that was awkward.

I think I'll be over and out now.

- Jo

I SHOT THE MOON, NORTH, EAST, WEST!

Once upon a time, a girl played Spider Solitaire.

This game was fun. It was addicting. She only played at the easiest level because she always lost whenever she tried the harder levels. Yes, it was a very slack, selfish thing to do.

And then she discovered Hearts.

The day she lost her virginity to this game changed her life forever.

It wasn't a particularly fun deflowering, either. In fact, it was a deflowering that involved three other people, whose names were Pauline, Michele and Ben. (They were later changed to North, East and West.)

Skipping ahead several years, the girl rediscovered Hearts while watching another girl play it during maths class. She decided to attempt it.

She read the rules. She attempted it. She lost. She cursed the world. She closed the game. It counted as a loss in her statistics. She opened it again. Tried to play. Another loss in her statistics. Hot damn.

She then Googled. Then Wikipedia'd. Then reread the rules. Then decided to play until she won!

AND GUESS WHAT? SHE NEVER DID!

BUT REGARDLESS OF THAT, SHE SHOT THE !@#$ING MOON!!!

(This means that I did something totally awesome that completely screws over my opponents and turns me into a Hearts superstar.)

Yes, people, gather around, gather around, give me a pat on the back, yep I know I'm totally awesome, no I don't care that I proceeded to lose in the next few rounds, wow this blog hasn't been updated for a while, has it? Oh, thank you, you shouldn't have, pink carnations are my favourite (actually, snowdrops are). Oh, I'm your role model? I'm glad. Yes, my game statistics consist of 22 losses and zero wins, but we all know I'm still the coolest person on the face of the earth.

Everybody-- GO AND PLAY HEARTS. RIGHT NOW.

REACH FOR THE MOON!